{"id":52132,"date":"2022-03-17T08:47:58","date_gmt":"2022-03-17T12:47:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/?p=52132"},"modified":"2022-10-31T12:21:49","modified_gmt":"2022-10-31T16:21:49","slug":"7-signs-your-partner-is-losing-interest-according-to-therapists","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/relationships\/7-signs-your-partner-is-losing-interest-according-to-therapists\/","title":{"rendered":"7 Signs Your Partner is Losing Interest, According to Therapists"},"content":{"rendered":"

When you sense that your significant other is pulling away from you in a relationship<\/a>, that distance can be painful and can ignite some deep-seated fears and insecurities.<\/p>\n

Maybe you just have a feeling that something is \u201coff\u201d with your partner. Maybe you\u2019ve noticed that the energy between you two has shifted \u2015 and not for the better.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf your partner is physical with you, but you have the feeling that he or she is mentally or emotionally 100 miles away or feels walled off and you can\u2019t quite make contact, they may be energetically closed off to you,\u201d marriage and family therapist Lynsie Seely<\/a> told HuffPost. \u201cWe tend to close off as a defense mechanism when we don\u2019t know how to communicate what we\u2019re feeling but need to stay engaged in the situation.\u201d<\/p>

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If you observe this happening in your relationship, try not to jump to conclusions about what\u2019s causing the distance. Instead, it\u2019s best to broach the subject with your partner and ask what\u2019s been on their mind, Seely said.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt could be that your partner is losing interest and doesn\u2019t know how to communicate that with you,\u201d she said. \u201cThere are other reasons your S.O. may feel the need to close up, so it\u2019s best not to assume anything here. A compassionate conversation to explore how your partner is feeling is a good first step.\u201d<\/p>\n

Besides that unsettling gut feeling, what are some of the other indications your partner might be losing interest? We asked therapists to share some of the signs so you know what to look out for.<\/p>\n

1. They\u2019ve stopped asking questions about the little things.<\/h2>\n

Couples in healthy relationships take a genuine interest in each other\u2019s lives \u2015 not just when it comes to the major things, but also the smaller, everyday things. For example, a partner who is engaged in the relationship knows you have a nerve-racking work meeting on Wednesday morning and will text you at lunchtime to ask how it went. A partner who has checked out might not remember or even care enough to ask.<\/p>

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\u201cAs couples \u2018tune out\u2019 of their partner or the relationship, they stop being interested in the small things that are happening as part of each other\u2019s day and life,\u201d couples therapist Isiah McKimmie<\/a> told HuffPost.<\/p>\n

2. They\u2019re unusually slow to respond to texts, emails and phone calls.<\/h2>\n

We all get busy and may be less responsive to texts depending on where we are, what we\u2019re doing and how much we have on our plate on any given day. But if your once-responsive partner suddenly becomes difficult to reach, it could be a sign they\u2019re distancing themselves.<\/p>\n

\u201cPeople can begin to pull away in subtle ways, so how responsive someone is to you may be an indicator that they are losing interest,\u201d psychologist Gina Delucca<\/a> said. \u201cCommon behavioral signs might be taking a long time to respond to text messages or phone calls. They might make excuses that they are \u2018busy at work\u2019 or \u2018forgot\u2019 to respond.\u201d<\/p>\n

Occasionally, these excuses may be valid \u2015 and, hey, a good partner deserves the benefit of the doubt. But if very delayed response times have become the new normal, it could be a red flag.<\/p>

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\u201cLet\u2019s be honest: Most of us carry our phones with us everywhere we go, and it only takes seconds to respond to someone, no matter how busy we are,\u201d Delucca added.<\/p>\n

3. When you try to connect, they ignore your attempts or pull away.<\/h2>\n

There\u2019s nothing wrong with asking for what you want in a relationship. After all, you can\u2019t expect your partner to be a mind-reader. That said, if you feel like you\u2019re constantly asking your S.O. for basic things like their attention and affection, and those requests are ignored, it might mean they\u2019ve checked out of the relationship.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf you feel like you\u2019re having to ask (or nag) your partner for more attention, it\u2019s likely they\u2019re losing interest,\u201d McKimmie said. \u201cIn healthy relationships, attempts to gain our partner\u2019s attention, affection or support are met in positive or affirming ways. When relationships become strained, these attempts are ignored or met with negative responses.\u201d<\/p>\n

Another sign? Your partner doesn\u2019t seem particularly torn up or regretful about this lack of connection.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen a person has lost interest in the relationship, he or she does not feel sadness or grief around \u2018losing\u2019 the relationship because he or she has already processed it and let it go,\u201d psychologist Anne Crowley<\/a> said.<\/p>

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4. You\u2019ve stopped arguing \u2014 and not in a good way.<\/h2>\n

If every disagreement between you and your partner seems to end in a screaming match, there may be some toxic relationship dynamics at play. But when couples fight fair<\/a> (e.g. no name-calling, yelling or stonewalling), it can actually be a sign that the relationship is healthy. So when your partner doesn\u2019t even have the will to argue anymore, it may be because they\u2019re no longer invested in the relationship.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhile fighting may not be the most productive part of a relationship, it is energy being put into the relationship,\u201d Crowley said. \u201cWe fight when we care, when we don\u2019t feel heard and want to be seen. When one stops fighting, this can be a sign of lost interest in the relationship.\u201d<\/p>\n

Perhaps you two used to have frequent arguments about keeping the apartment tidy<\/a>. Now your partner doesn\u2019t even seem to notice, let alone mention, when your laundry basket is overflowing.<\/p>\n

\u201cIn other words, they\u2019re not putting in the effort to re-stabilize the relationship,\u201d Crowley explained. \u201cThey\u2019re OK walking away from it, even when you are wanting to keep the fight going.\u201d<\/p>

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5. You rarely, if ever, touch each other anymore.<\/h2>\n

In the early stages of dating, it\u2019s quite normal for couples to be extra affectionate with one another because of what psychologist Jamie Goldstein<\/a> calls \u201cnew relationship energy\u201d (aka NRE). Those butterflies and starry eyes might make you more inclined to hold hands in public, snuggle up on the couch or have more frequent sex.<\/p>\n

Over time, levels of NRE are bound to dissipate some \u2014 that\u2019s normal. But if the hugs, kisses, back rubs and sex have all but disappeared, it could be an indication that your partner is pulling away.<\/p>\n

\u201cAs interest begins to wane, so do displays of physical affection,\u201d Goldstein said. \u201cIf after the sparks of a shiny new partnership settle, you notice a major shift in your partner\u2019s level of physical affection towards you, this might be an indicator of disinterest.\u201d<\/p>\n

6. They stop making an effort with your friends and family.<\/h2>\n

If your bonds with your friends and family are important to you, so should they be to your partner. Your partner may not be over the moon about spending yet another long weekend visiting your parents, but they\u2019re usually happy to oblige, knowing it means a lot to you. If your partner once made an effort to connect with your loved ones but now withdraws from conversation or avoids spending time with them altogether, it could point to their apathy toward the relationship.<\/p>

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\u201cAlthough we might not always want to spend time with them, we do because it supports our partner and the relationship,\u201d McKimmie said. \u201cIf your partner is no longer making an effort with your friends or family, they\u2019re not making an effort for the relationship.\u201d<\/p>\n

7. You no longer feel like a priority in their life.<\/h2>\n

Certain situations may demand the bulk of our attention at times \u2015 young kids, a big work deadline, a sick family member, etc. But for the most part, you and your partner should be prioritizing each other\u2019s needs and supporting one another above all else. If your S.O. is spending much of their time and energy on work, a new hobby or their group of friends, with no end in sight, it could be a sign they\u2019ve checked out.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou deserve to feel important and special in your in partner\u2019s life,\u201d Seely said. \u201cIf that isn\u2019t happening, it may be time to step back to assess the relationship.\u201d<\/p>\n

And if you feel like you\u2019re always the one to initiate communication and make plans to spend time together, consider that a sign, too.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnother sign within this realm might be repeated cancellation of plans,\u201d Delucca said. \u201dRelationships are more likely to be successful when there is mutual interest and equal effort put into it.\u201d<\/p>\n

This article originally appeared on HuffPost.com<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n

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These changes in behavior could indicate your significant other has checked out of the relationship, experts say.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":47274,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_oasis_is_in_workflow":0,"_oasis_original":0,"_oasis_task_priority":"2normal","fbia_status":""},"categories":[15661],"tags":[28546],"yoast_head":"\n7 Signs Your Partner is Losing Interest, According to Therapists - FamilyToday<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"These changes in behavior could indicate your significant other has checked out of the relationship, experts say.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, follow\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"7 Signs Your Partner is Losing Interest, According to Therapists\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"These changes in behavior could indicate your significant other has checked out of the relationship, experts say.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/relationships\/7-signs-your-partner-is-losing-interest-according-to-therapists\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"FamilyToday\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2022-03-17T12:47:58+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2022-10-31T16:21:49+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/wp-media.familytoday.com\/2021\/06\/pexels-liza-summer-6382479.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1280\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"853\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Sharon Kirk\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"7 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Organization\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/#organization\",\"name\":\"BN Media, LLC\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/\",\"sameAs\":[\"https:\/\/www.pinterest.com\/famtoday\"],\"logo\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/#logo\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/wp-media.familytoday.com\/2020\/03\/bnmedia-logo-lg.png\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/wp-media.familytoday.com\/2020\/03\/bnmedia-logo-lg.png\",\"width\":1315,\"height\":311,\"caption\":\"BN Media, LLC\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/#logo\"}},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/\",\"name\":\"FamilyToday\",\"description\":\"Here today, better tomorrow.\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/#organization\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/relationships\/7-signs-your-partner-is-losing-interest-according-to-therapists\/#primaryimage\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/wp-media.familytoday.com\/2021\/06\/pexels-liza-summer-6382479.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/wp-media.familytoday.com\/2021\/06\/pexels-liza-summer-6382479.jpg\",\"width\":1280,\"height\":853,\"caption\":\"Pexels\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/relationships\/7-signs-your-partner-is-losing-interest-according-to-therapists\/#webpage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.familytoday.com\/relationships\/7-signs-your-partner-is-losing-interest-according-to-therapists\/\",\"name\":\"7 Signs Your Partner is Losing Interest, According to Therapists - 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